I recently came across this video in my FB Reels feed, and it gave me a swell of inspiration to star DMing again after I'm not sure how many years after feeling the burn-out.
Reel from @dianaoftherose on IG
This video speaks to the option of what to do when you TPK your group. I have never experienced this issue in my 40 years of role playing, but a few years ago I was almost part of a TPK in a D&D game that was being run virtually during the Covid pandemic.
To give some perspective, I have been primarily gaming in White Wolf's classic World of Darkness. I started playing Vampire: The Masquerade when the 2nd edition was first coming out back in the 90's. I did manage to play some Dungeons & Dragons again when Wizards of the Coast published 3rd edition. I always enjoyed playing in the high fantasy world of D&D, but the fact that I spent the better part of almost 30 years in a more modern setting with the World of Darkness really caused a drain on my imagination for D&D.
I never really got into 4th edition, but when 5th edition came out, my interest was peaked again to try and get back into high fantasy. My biggest problems were:
- As much as I appreciate the published materials/adventures, I have a few ideas of some homebrew locations that I would like to incorporate into my campaign. I know that I can work to adapt things to suit my needs, but I don't think I've ever actually settled on an actual end goal.
- Though I have had over 40 years of experience roleplaying, I still have a great deal of anxiety of running a game again. When I was in my 20's, I would regularly run both tabletop and LARP games as a DM/ST. I enjoyed this, but it again has been many years since I've been able to do this for a high fantasy setting.
- Like many role-players, I have social anxiety that really inhibits me from socializing with people. This creates a huge issue when considering a play ground. I have 2 close friends that I am comfortable gaming with, but 2 people do not make a decent sized adventuring group for a game like D&D.
- In past games, I have always run them in Theatre of the Mind as opposed to using miniatures and maps. While this has been alright when playing in the World of Darkness, the past couple of years playing in a 5E game has shown me the wonders of using minis and maps; especially using tools like D&D Beyond and Roll20. I want to be able to provide a fun time for my players so my desire is wanting to be able to use minis and maps, but my anxiety makes me feel that if I don't have all the right resources that my attempt will fall flat. Ginny Di recently posted a video regarding the debate between Theatre of the mind and using minis and maps. It was a good watch but also helped to feed into my anxiety. While I have been working to build a collection of minis and resources, the back of my mind keeps telling me that it's not enough.
- Several years ago, I thought about designing a new RPG system that would incorporate a multiverse experience similar to Paladium's Megaverse settings, but my motivation became overwhelmed when I saw all the prospective systems being designed and published through the likes of Kickstarter. Right now, at age 50, I don't feel like I should spend my remaining time on this word attempting to recreate/redesign the wheel.
